Work From Home – What have I done


– Who Killed Malcolm X:  Well-researched documentary. A bit bored by the flow of the story very similar to a really-damn-boring-but-used-to-be-super-hyped documentary series “Serials".  I was really absorbed into the speeches of Mr. Malcolm X.  All of them.  I used to hate some activists in Hong Kong who promote independence ideation and/or protest with force. But I feel myself a little bit different after being absorbed into his speeches.  Especially his idea that, you need to make your oppressors afraid of you. Without force, without real action to compliment, civilised disobedience (legal or not) alone cannot ever make your oppressors afraid.  What I’ve seen happening in Hong Kong since June 2019, I feel his case has been verdicted on his side.

*But I am not foolish into saying independence and protest with force are the way to go. I have a government job. I am not that foolish. At least not yet.

But I am even more absorbed into the suitcase activist, the protagonist in the documentary (Abdur-Rahman Muhammed), who walked and drove tediously repetitively from Mosques to Local Councils to FBI archives, for vindication of Justice. He did not have great talent to speech.  He was not even good at communicating with the targets he was interviewing, or persuading (except the Pulitzer Writer who is as nerdy as he is). He was just a down-to-earth man carrying his baggy black old worn suitcase full of archive newspaper and FBI extracts and his old Dell Laptop about the assassination of his idol Malcolm everyday. To search for the nuance and details to prove his hypothesis.  I feel I have a lot in him. I feel he is very relatable.  Maybe because I am that kind of not attractive person as well.  As a civil servant myself for so many years, I believe very much in a power called “paper pushing". A government works because of smart leader(s) with her vision and leadership. But this is only one thing.  Fundamentally, a government needs a lot of baggy suitcase men like Adur-Rahman, to carry the facts and papers from office to office to have the so called vision/leadership/policy pushed through.  A government is a workshop of information delivery. Papers are nuts and bolts of this delivery machine. I am not saying I am proud of my job. Never. I just wanna say. If you are civil servants, and you are working like Abdur-Rahman for the pure course of facts and truth. And you are proud of yourself, I don’t judge you.


– She’s gotta have it: Oh….so familiar. There was a used-to-be-famous-and-many-people-admire-the-authenticity film made in Hong Kong called 晚九朝五.  Now I realize (so late) that film was as authentic as any Hong Kong production.  The film is a pastiche of She’s gotta have it from Spike Lee: From the off-the-story colloquy of characters of their feeling about themselves and their sex partner(s); to the main plot of the character(s) having a bohemian sex life being misunderstood as sex addicts and be required to “sort-it-out-and-make-a-decision".  In Hong Kong, from prime to dust now, today, authenticity is all along meaning “I copy something cool and remake it to claim originality. And catch me if you can".  The more I watch, the more I feel how hopeless is Hong Kong production. They simply suck.


-Titans: Nothing special. Just that my son and daughter love Teen Titans and I let them see what Titans are supposed to feel. And my son is scared out of the living room every time raven’s got her demon inside out. His expression is even more entertaining than Titans itself.


– David Foster Wallace’s Infinite Jest: I admire his research about the drug abuse scene in 80s and 90s in America. He’s a crazy genius. I am not. I hate I am not. So I admire him so much.  He doesn’t deserve to die. Many people here deserve death. Including me. A waste of resources. But not him.


– I wish Democratic National Committee this time does something just. Doing dirty works in the name of justice and democracy is exactly the reason why you lost 4 years ago. I hope you are not so stupid as doing it again. It’s a smear and insult of the things you are supposed to exalt. Mind if I’m saying.


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