If I have to quit, so be it

I love Emma Barnett, and can’t get enough of her voice, so mystic that I sometimes find myself lost somewhere in her show and not able to listen to her clearly. I’ve been loving her since about 2 years ago when she sub as presenter of Newsnight.  Sound a bit stalker…hha.. Not pathetic love like the stalker of another Newsnight presenter Matlis, but like the love I have with Nish Kumar! I feel relieved and refreshing when I can hear them around.

Sounds abit 戀英青 right? Even my wife calls me so….Fuck it! OK, I love listening to and watching English programmes. If that makes me 戀英青, so be it. I think, sometimes, when I’m branded once it’s difficult to unbrand myself. Futile, even I suddenly get circumlocutory about 蘋果日報 and everything local. So, fuck it! If you say I am, so am I.

Yesterday I listened to another Emma Barnett show – Eye of the Storm

It’s about Nemone Lethbridge (I knew nothing about her prior) this time. One of the first female barristers in UK.  She had to quit because she suddenly became the eye of a storm, epicentre of a quake, when she was married to a convicted murderer, Jimmy O’Connor, who had served 11 years of life imprisonment and been released on parole. She did something the society deemed too controversial, at the times; made a decision that caused a damage to her highly respected profession deemed irreversible, at the times. And she quit. Painful. But if she had to quit, so be it.

I know that the activist teacher, Miss Lam, quit her school this week.  I feel that these two women, 40 years apart, have mystic connection with each other. I feel, just feel, that they share the same fate in one way or another.  I still find it inconceivable a teacher who swears after work, in a circumstance completely unrelated to her job / profession, like Miss Lam did, would be deemed too controversial or even unacceptable by the society at any time. Same as I feel a barrister who love a citizen, who has already served his life imprisonment and been released on parole (i.e. judged safe to be integrated into the society as ordinary citizen), would be deemed catastrophic by her institute, by society, by Daily Telegraph.  But who am I to judge inconceivable from conceivable? Who are they, them two women, to resist the  decision by the times that is final judge?  If the times has branded one at her peril, one cannot un-brand her. I cannot un-brand her. Futile, as I cannot release her on parole.

Only times can undo things he done. Only times will tell.

After decades she was barred from Bar Association, Nemone Lethbridge, in exile, was rescued by an old-fashsioned chap, as she called him, who thought she had been being unfairly treated, and took her back to the chamber. Hurrah! After decades, the times reversed the decision that used to be irreversible. The times re-brand hero who used to be shithole! Only times is flexible. Not so flexible though, as it has been taking him fucking decades.

To Miss Lam, I feel you have been so utterly unfairly treated by Hong Kong,  a place I hate so much (I am more 憎港青 than 戀英青), but at the times. And I don’t try to guess how long the times will take to reverse the decision, that everyone, even teacher, who swear a swine, get fag, after work is no fucking big deal. I don’t know. Maybe another fucking decades! Who fucking knows?! But the times will tell.

But Nemone Lethbridge did one funny thing in the show. She asked “can I swear". Emma let her, and she did swear, but with a beep. Maybe Miss Lam, next time you can ask before you swear, with a beep. It would be better. Not now though. Maybe another fucking decades later.





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