到最後左拼又湊的，叫做完成Rino要我做的那個讀書報告。由於牙嗲奴基本上是講一個叫Iago的人無端端唔知點解要壞的去壞。番工個老細升另一個唔升自己，照計可以，亦應該做低被升嗰個就算。但他就揀做低被升嗰個不特止，還要做到個老細冚家鏟。我覺得件事由頭到尾太無厘頭。太Professor BUN所講的Non Sequitur，於是我把大量的無線經典戇尻劇，如義不容情、大時代、巨人、天地男兒、天地豪情、創世紀、宮心計、巾幗梟雄⋯⋯的故事大綱寫上去，然後講出他們的人物設定跟牙嗲奴的相似程度，去推敲莎士比亞對香港電視劇的深遠影響。全部的奸覺都是這樣的。一個奸人是這樣煉成的。All the villains are quite similar. There was an original reason, or excuse, for one to develop his own evilness. Maybe the impoverish state villain was being put in at the start. Maybe the villain felt injustice in how he was treated differently than the protagonist he used to hate, or love. Or maybe the villain was grieved by the manner he was treated by the protagonist, and thereafter sought revenge. As the stories developed, oftener than not villains developed a cynic attitude against any goodness and virtue they found in the world. Thus the famous quote,
Cynicism then gradually rotted even further to a state that the original reason, or excuse, that made him bad at the start, was not important at all. Love, hate, craving, repulsion, depression, hysteria, kind heart, malignancy, peace, anguish, would mean nothing, and tell no difference amongst one another by then. The villains would find out the fantasy, the power, the attraction, or evil in itself, by itself. In short, most of them became evil for evil sake. And most of them confessed they made a call to be evil just because they felt cool being as bad as one could. I find the above attraction of evil best reflected in one of the best lines by Iago in Act I:
Virtue! a fig! ’tis in ourselves that we are thus
or thus. Our bodies are our gardens, to the which
our wills are gardeners…the
power and corrigible authority of this lies in our
wills. If the balance of our lives had not one
scale of reason to poise another of sensuality, the
blood and baseness of our natures would conduct us
to most preposterous conclusions: but we have
reason to cool our raging motions, our carnal
stings, our unbitted lusts, whereof I take this that
you call love to be a sect or scion.
Virtue is nonsense. Power to transcend our evilness lies in our will. Reason ride over and indulge our sensuality. The blood and baseness of our natures. Reason as our tool to cool / control / materialise our motions, our carnal stings, our unbeaten lusts. In short, being bad is cool.
“Wow" 這個是Rino，看緊我的大作。又回到起點，嗰間TA房，她嗰張枱，著過的嗰件American Eagle格仔衫，戴過的嗰副眼鏡。
“You seem fancy drama very much, man"
“No. I just want to get a date."
“No?" 她除下副眼鏡啤住我。嘩⋯⋯想殺死人咩⋯⋯ “but you’ve watched a lot according to what you written."
“They are nothing. They are just TV drama. I used to watch TV drama every night at home. It’s easy. And, I have nothing to do except that. My father and mother usually in church during the time I back home" 我答。
“Oh. Your parents are preachers, or ministers?" 她無端端爆一句出來我唔知點好。"嘎？"我問。
“Oh nothing. OK. When d’ wanna go? And where? "
“I have a day off this Friday."
“Alright. Friday’s good."
“Thank God" 呢句我又心爆出來的。她聽後笑。她笑呀⋯⋯
“You pick me up here then?"
“I’m tourist here y’ know. Everything here’s fancy for me."
“you mean…which place here may repulse me? No. no. I think of none. Even Repulse Bay doesn’t repulse me."
“What’ bout this: You. Think of a place you like most and take me. Today’d be wonderful."
咁呀。咁去雲泉仙館食齋啦不如。it would be wonderful. 我諗佢都會是咁講。慢慢知道佢來自Massachusetts。 間大學都是Massachusetts。 她最想去的並不是香港。是日本。唔怪得改埋個日本名。問佢真名呢，佢又話唔想講喎。娘得濟掛。佢原來真是識日文的。咁來香港問她會否有點Lost in Translation啦，佢又話唔係好介意。我們真是行女人街、廟街，甚至砵蘭街，佢真是鍾意架嘛。你見到佢真是攞住件娘到爆廠的女人街旗袍喺度試。東方對他們的魔力不是我們土生土長在這片土地的人能夠明白的。我記得，我看過一部電視劇，又係TVB，講文革剛完開放初期，做侍應的吳鎮宇遇到一個外國遊客，見到佢手上那隻娘到不得了的茅主席肖像上鍊表，立刻愛上，並用一百蚊美金買下，吳鎮宇和其他在工作的員工都非常驚異。我相信，從Rino在女人街的表現，真係有得揀，他們在西九都會想看故宮博物館，多過英國博物館。只是我們永遠都不會明白為什麼。又或者，都是非常濕淺的道理：–
“Rarity makes vogue" Rino解釋了，或中國人的物以罕為貴，或香港人的新屎坑零舍香。
走到一間我都未曾去過的music cafe。整間cafe都是深啡色，和枱頭白色的宜家傢俬燈，和三幾個人喺度board game，和近cafe唯一的一個窗的一個細台、幾個宜家傢俬白色cushion、一部琴、和一支木結他。都是架著眼鏡的Rino，托著下巴、側面著我的看著那個台，良久，然後望向我：
“Ah…you wanna play some music for me guitarist?"
“Er…..It is not my plan" 老老豆豆真是冇諗過。想起Chris Hemsworth的雷神鎚，我甚至想上叱吒903頒獎典禮宣佈my music die already。所以我答完佢後我都唔知講乜好。 只是望住佢。她整起右面臉的肌肉，對眼下垂的望著我，唔知是不滿我答案定點，講左句：–
“We’re supposed to date right? Some romance of yours is what I expected am I not entitled to?"
OK…我想了一想，腦裡想起了呢隻歌，It might be you。一套好舊好舊的電影杜絲先生的主題曲。唔知點解，唔好問我點解。我就是想到這首。而我甚至唔知這首歌算不算浪漫。因為套野據聞唔多浪漫的。但我都講左句 OK然後上台，玩左以下的呢個cover，一個突然之間唔知點解好緊張的cover。
台下就只有佢和甚至無閒望向我的boardgame 友，玩左個滿手都震晒的版本。她仍然只是托著頭，又好似望住你又好似唔係的表情。我忙得甚至無閒決定她有否望過來，荒亂中像回到從前在教會很怕很怕人鴉雀無聲的回應的當年。每次很想有多一次改過改正機會的當年，而我深知每個表演者能夠的就只有這暫借的幾分鐘。生命冇take two。
“um….a sort of ….bittersweet. You surprised me anyway. I’ve never expected it might be you kind of romance."
“What do you expect then?"
“No…" 她又托住臉望著我，"no" 再強調一次，"I haven’t expected anything. I appreciate yours very much."
“You are….hard to understand" 我說。
“Everyone’s hard to understand." 是她的回應。她又望一望個台，"Or…you would understand anyone by living in one, thinking what one’s thinking."
“Thank you, guitarist."
“no thank you."
“Oh…it’s bad bad English…you appreciate my thank you right?"
“so, thank you. You are one of the special ones who dated me, it it is a date."
“because I played you guitar?"
“No. somebody did that before. But never it might be you. You’re special, a it might be you kind of special. And you’re the only one who submitted the book review so far."
“It’s not compulsory you know? So, thank you."