Recently I taught my son and daughter this, when they went bellicose for something. May be toys, which is normal for brother and sister at age between 4 and 6.
After my roaring, their crying, my forcing / bullying them to say sorry and shake hands with each other, I taught this.
We Don’t Fight. We Negotiate.
“Your grandpa and granny used to fight a lot. But I want you to learn to negotiate.
“The differences between the two are obvious.
When you are going to fight, there is no pre-set agenda. But just one goal. Crush your opponent at all cost. Get em slain, flesh and blood. At all cost. When you negotiate, you and agenda, and you would tell your opponent your agenda. And you would have agenda agreed prior to negotiation even starts.
When you are going to fight, there is no inter-mission. There is no rest. No lunch. No dinner. You fight until your opponent is so undermined as to let you walk out of the cage. MMA. Even worse, as a referee is not supposed to be in the middle during a fight to ensure the safety of both of you. When you negotiate, you can always tell your opponents. Can we pause? For a pee? For my phone is ringing? For I suddenly have something more urgent? For lunch? Maybe we can even have lunch together and get back here after an hour to continue? For we get some sleep and come tomorrow again?
Nonetheleast, and maybe most of all, when you are going to fight, you don’t suppose to get get anything. Your opponent’s blood and tissue except. You may it or break it. You survive or die? You’ve got a lot of emotion and adrenaline. Get ready to finish with mutually agreed destruction. An MAD. When you negotiate, you always want to get something. And you are ready to give something in exchange. You are ready to solve, no matter how boisterous your poise appears. You have offered price. You have real price that makes you happy enough.
唔知佢地明唔明. 以現在各處的政局, 亦唔見得大人明. 個個都是古蠱仔. 今日等我嚟收你皮. 你東昇同我欄……咩呀咩呀…..大飛你同我收嗲. 個個都只有老牛, 冇大牛. 個個都識吹雞. 硬係冇人評估下件事有幾細魏(粵音第一聲)/廢閪(係粵音第一聲). 可以的話我推銷大家看west wing season 2 (定3?) 一集. 講一班中國難民坐住架漁般到了聖地牙哥(城巿, 唔係酒店)水域, 美國一間人道教會要收留佢地, 基於人道立場;中國政府抗議, 叫華盛頓唔會干預中國內政(佢地成日都是呢句). 最後總統好似唔親自接佢地. 只叫人道教會自己出海救人. 美國政府宣佈唔撚關佢事. 類似阿SAM問點解. Bartlet 總統講: 人道教會做了英雄, 可以大大聲屌華盛頓麻木不仁, 中國政府可以同世界講他贏了外交漂亮一仗. 班難民成功到美國. Everyone got something. This is diplomacy.
當然美國還有沒有能力做以上的事. 定只是打J (係WEST WING都是打J. 咁你無線法律捍衛公義又是否打J自己決定.). 但有一篇文想開心SHARE.
有一段就是講. 如果DONALD真是獲選, 白宮就自然要想法子令佢入來工作. 無論想唔想. 政權就得自然交接. 民主就是有能力, 亦有責任. 包容所有今日覺得離經叛道的東西. 同性婚姻. 黑人教育平等. 奴隸廢除. 女人可以墮胎. 英國可以離開. 甚至分裂. 香港可以獨立. 議員甚至可以唔效忠任何一個單位. 他的MANDATE只來自選民. 全部都離經叛. 但只是他夠人支持, 民主自然要遷就. 中國可以用軍隊代警隊. 只要夠人支持. 民主自然要遷就.
但我唔係講任何一個地方. 我發UP風啫. 當我冇講過. 唔好強姦我.